Bridesmaid Duties

Bridesmaid duties … real or ceremonial? Have you heard about the Bride who “fired” one of her bridesmaids via email?  The rejected bridesmaid then shared the email on twitter.  I just glanced at a few tweets, and the bride was crucified by other tweeters!  What do you think about it?

I probably am one of the few who was on the side of the bride.  While I would encourage any daughter of mine, or client NOT to “fire” an attendant, fact is, the “Twitter Bridesmaid” wasn’t doing her job. Based on the email to the bridesmaid, which she shared on twitter, (how’s that for a friend? Even though she blacked out the bride’s last name, everyone in their social circle knew who she was), the “fired” bridesmaid did absolutely nothing for the bride in her role as honor attendant.  When asked to be an attendant, the young lady should have thanked the bride prettily, and declined the honor.  If you don’t have the time or the money to be a bridesmaid, gracefully decline.  Because being a wedding attendant is expensive and time consuming.  You are expected to buy your own dress, shoes, gifts, (shower, bachelorette, and wedding), and travel.  (The bride should spring for your housing the night before the wedding and the night of the wedding however).  You should do your best to attend ALL pre-wedding events – but the rehearsal, rehearsal dinner, wedding… UNTIL THE END, are non-negotiable.  If you can’t be at those events, you shouldn’t be a bridesmaid. Period.

According to the brief email, the “fired” bridesmaid shared on twitter, it appeared that she attended no pre-wedding events, (I took it to include the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner, but could be wrong), and wanted to fly back before the reception was over.  Again, if the bride were my daughter or client, I’d encourage her to suck it up and deal with the lack-luster bridesmaid; but the twitter bride was well within her scope of expectations to “fire” her friend.  As for the email, she probably thought things would be less heated via the written word, and she offered to speak if the bridesmaid desired.

Perhaps “Bridesmaidzillas” are why some brides are opting to have only family members as honor attendants, (as one of my daughters did),  or have no bridesmaids at all. Perhaps that’s why the English use children?  …less temperamental than grown women.  I think Brides today are trying to make it easier on their attendants.  Note the photo above.  The bride from this wedding I did allowed her attendants to wear dresses they felt good in.  The colors were not even expected to be in the same color palate.

Moral…Brides be sensitive to the costs, both monetary and time, to your attendants; and bridesmaids, say “No, but thank you,” if you can’t do the job.

 

Wedding in Hot Weather

Wedding in Hot Weather…Wedding Season is upon us and with it, hot weather. Not only must you think of keeping yourself cool, but your guests as well.

One of my summer brides chose to have pre-made, pre-poured Lavender cocktails ready and waiting for guests as they arrived for the ceremony.  I took a little sip, and they were delicious.  A word of caution, however…if it is dangerously hot, nothing beats plain old cool water for hydration.

And don’t forget the bride!  Make sure your dress is in keeping with the season you will wear your dress.  While you may choose and order your dress in winter, you will probably wear it in warmer weather.  Choose something you will be comfortable in.  The bride below has chosen well for a summer wedding.

A reputable caterer will ensure your food is kept well refrigerated and safe, but please discuss with them their plans to keep your cake cool.  Almost all cakes should be refrigerated as long as possible before the “cake cutting”.

in the photo above, the combination cutting cake on top and cupcakes below is a good choice for hot weather.  It is easier to find space in a cramped fridge, even if professional sized.  This cake style can be broken down very easily to use any space available.

Your flowers:

Stress to your florist that you want something that will hold up well in the heat, and ask that your  bouquets stay in temporary water filled vases as long as possible.

Choosing a lot of greenery in your bouquet, (like the one above), is a great way to keep your flowers fresh.  Greenery requires less water.

If your venue is outside, and you have no natural shade, consider a tent for your guests’ comfort.

Another option for a ceremony that has no shade, is to offer guests umbrellas – yes…Umbrellas!  Granted, the guests holding them would probably have to stand because they would take up room on the chairs, and also obscure others’ view; but many would be happy to escape the beating sun –even if they had to stand.

Your wedding will be beautiful, no matter the weather, just make sure your prepared for it!  🙂

DIY And Make Your Own Wedding Veil

DIY And Make Your Own Wedding Veil!  This is a terrific way to save money.  When a bride writes her wedding budget, her wedding dress is definitely included.  But what is sometimes forgotten, is the cost of the veil.  And they are not inexpensive.  Veils can range from over $100.00 for an inexpensive veil, to over a thousand +.  My daughters’ were somewhere in the middle. Remember, I have two more daughters to plan weddings for; with their veils, I will take a different approach.

Below is my own wedding veil, and headpiece.  A great option, in my book…is to DIY and make your own wedding veil.  (I have included below a starting point for supplies and a youtube video to get you started.) A beautiful way to spice up your creation is to use either an heirloom headpiece, as my two older daughters did, (mine!), or purchase a spectacular one.  Perhaps you will make some new traditions of your own.

The next photo shows my second daughter wearing my headpiece.

The bride below secures her veil with a stand-out hair ornament.  It’s a lovely choice.

Modern Styling Ideas of Wedding Veils with Bridal Headpieces ...

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The next photo showcases a veil from one of my brides.  Her mother made her it.  It’s just exquisite.

Below are some general supplies to get your started on making a standard veil.

3-10 yards of 108″ Bridal Illusion (100% tulle — I got mine at Joann’s) — make sure it matches your gown. I made a veil that was a few inches below my waist and used two and a half yards. You can use 56″, it just won’t be as wide or full.

Bridal Comb (I used plastic bridal combs, though I imagine you could use metal combs  as well.)

White Nylon Thread

Sewing Scissors

Lace of choice (optional) (at least one yard more than the length of your veil.)

Beads (optional) and beading needle

Fabric Glue

From : clarkscondensed.com

Wondering what type of netting you should choose for your veil?  Check out a previous blog post on wedding veil fabrics.  Just click on the link:

Wedding Veil Fabrics –

Click on the next link for an instruction video on how to make your own wedding veil: youtube.com

Above: my oldest daughter post wedding ceremony.  She wore my headpiece, but chose to wear this lovely wreath for the reception. Photo: Hannah Rachael

 

French Wedding Style – More Flair Than Ours?

French Wedding Style…does it really have more oomph than ours?  Well, that depends on whom you talk to.  The French tend to do things with style, panache, and flair. They are elegant while still being understated.  Take the wedding cake below.  How simple is that?  But yet…how beautiful!

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And oh, my…how lovely is the French wedding cake below?  I love macaroons, and I’d say the bride and groom from this wedding does too.  It’s colorful, festive, I bet delicious, and all the while, understated.

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The groom below?  Well, clearly he is a Frenchman.  Just check out his cutting edge style. I love the red pocket square, socks and shoestrings.  But I dare anyone would accuse him of being too “matchy-matchy.”  Somehow he can just pull it off.  I’m not a big fan of the groom and groomsmen doing the whole wild sock thing, but then it’s their wedding, not mine.  And I do think it’s nice when the groom gets involved and puts his own stamp on the affair.

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And as far as outdoor wedding pictures go…you can’t beat these!  I highly encourage you to try to have not only photos, but some part of your wedding, either the ceremony, cocktail hour, reception, (or all three!), outside.  It lends such an air of festivity which a ballroom event can’t compete with.

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Below, the Eiffel Town at night, photo taken by yours truly.

The next picture, also taken by me, is of the brilliantly beautiful Sacre Cour. It has the best view of all Paris.  It’s quite a climb up to it, but well worth it.

Yes, our American weddings are things of beauty.  But I think the ‘take away’ we can gleen from the French is, don’t go over-board.  Less really… sometimes… is more.