Bridesmaids’ Duties

A long time friend recently asked me, “So, Mary, what are the duties of the bridesmaids?”  So for my friend, Cindy, and anyone else who is interested, here is a good sum-up of the bridesmaids’ duties, directly from

  • “Offer to help with prewedding tasks. Try to be specific when you volunteer. For example, say, “Would you like me to help you shop for bridesmaids dresses/stuff invitations/pack for the honeymoon?” instead of just, “What can I do?”
  • Scout out bridesmaid dresses, shoes, jewelry, and other wedding accessories. Pay for the entire ensemble. (Break in your shoes before the wedding day — that will minimize slipping, blisters, and aching tootsies.)
  • Help to plan, cohost, and pay for the bridal shower and bachelorette party with other bridesmaids.


  • If the maid/matron of honor isn’t already handling this task, keep a record of all the gifts received at various parties and bridal showers (so that the bride/couple can write thank-you notes); maintain RSVP lists.
  • Attend the ceremony rehearsal and rehearsal dinner. (Keep abreast of all prewedding parties, and go to as many as possible.)
  • Run last-minute errands. On the day of the wedding, be on hand to confirm flower delivery times, meet and greet the ceremony officient, or satisfy junk food cravings.
  • Stand in the receiving line at the bride’s request.
  • Serve as auxiliary hostess at the reception by introducing guests, making sure they know where the bar is located, and inviting them to sign the guest book.


  • Hit the dance floor when the music kicks in. Dance with groomsmen during the formal first-dance sequence. Also, be on the lookout for toe-tapping guests who might need encouragement and/or a dance partner.
  • Give the matron/maid of honor a break by helping to carry the bride’s wedding gown train whenever necessary. Bustle the train before dancing begins, and be ready to help fix it if it comes unhooked. Accompany the bride on visits to the restroom, if asked.
  • Purchase a wedding present perhaps with one or several of the other bridesmaids. This provides more buying power, and two heads are better than one when it comes to wedding gift ideas. Sometimes the entire bridesmaid troupe pitches in for one knock-her-socks-off wedding gift.


  • Be a trooper, no matter how stressful the ordeal becomes. Try not to complain about the bridesmaid dress — even if the color is horrendous. Be gracious and tactful.
  • Provide plenty of emotional support during the planning and on the wedding day.”

Lots for young ladies to do, and I have three daughters in KK’s bridal party!

Three of my daughters below, at Maggie’s wedding.

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How Will You Ask Your Bridesmaids to Be in Your Wedding?


How will you ask your bridesmaids to be in your wedding?  It’s a big time. If your bridesmaids are local, there is dress shopping, shoe shopping, and let’s not forget emotional support!

Then there’s the financial strain.  Those, often hideous, bridesmaids dresses are not cheap…and neither are the shoes.  Your attendants’ travel may be another expense, if they’re from out of town.  Remember… the bride and her family are responsible for their lodging the night before the wedding and the night of.

Let’s not forget the parties!  Your bridesmaids will certainly be invited to a wedding shower or two, as well as your bachelorette.  They may even be hosting one of those events.

As for “bridesmaids invitations” to the big event, the jewelry route is an option. Below is a lovely necklace requesting a bride’s friend to “stand up” for her.  This is a economical option.  Not only is it an a beautiful invitation, but it can double as the “attendant gift” a brides traditionally give to her maids.









What about a humorous approach?  These “rings” simulating a proposal, and are adorable.  If you’re interested in purchasing something like them, there is a link below.










You might want a more casual approach, like the mug in our next photo.  Cute, and definitely practical.



My daughter, Kathleen, who will be married July 3, 2015, made the most adorable notebooks and gave them to her bridesmaids when she officially asked them to be in her wedding.  Inside, she wrote a personal letter to each, gave instruction as to their duties, (she is SUCH a big sister!), and then left space for their own personal planning pages.  It’s truly a wonderful keepsake.

Maggie…You have big shoes to fill in your capacity as Matron of Honor at KK’s shindig!










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